Experts say sermons don’t work with children and teenagers

Just serious about their children’s puberty, many dad and mom already really feel chilly. With so many psychological, bodily and social adjustments, battle turns into extra frequent throughout this stage.

Panmella Bulhões, 35, with her children Lucas Bulhões, 13, and Henrique Bulhões, 11: dwelling cinema session

| Photo: Douglas Snyder/AT

Experts warn, nonetheless, that lecturing and scolding will not be good methods for bettering relationships with teenagers.

During adolescence, younger persons are practising their steps in direction of maturity and due to this fact, it’s regular for them to have episodes of temper swings, withdrawal and aggression, explains psychologist and household therapist Claudio Miranda.

Experts clarify that one of the best technique to deal with such conditions, nonetheless, is to not impose recommendation. “Telling and scolding are essentially the most used communication strategies, as dialogue continues to be a problem in educating children. In the face of adversity, making an attempt to get nearer is a option to strengthen emotional bonds”.

Clinical psychologist Sirle Ferreira has analyzed that, the truth is, many dad and mom undertaking their beliefs about adolescence on their children and fail to know that society is consistently altering. Misunderstanding generational variations can have an effect on relationships, he says.

“Adolescence is a interval of many questions. Children should be revered for his or her individuality and led with out authoritarianism. Teenagers have opinions and recommendation would not work. Such conduct really creates alienation.”

The pandemic continues to have an effect on household relationships, and for household therapist Vanessa Cavalcante, the challenges of elevating children have intensified.

“The pandemic has exacerbated already present challenges. Over the years, we have now had an excessive amount of publicity to expertise and too little give attention to human growth, and we have now gotten misplaced in care and overprotection. We want dialogue to search out steadiness. Children’s schooling is a undertaking of not less than 20 years”.

New habits for household bonding

The video games took brothers Lukas Bulhoes, 13, and Henrik Bulhoes, 11, each day. The boys misplaced rely of the hours in entrance of the TV and but, the harm was achieved: they obtained indignant and fought

Even his relationship with his mom, Panmella Bulhões, 35, was affected by the boredom brought on by the behavior. So, the administrator began an open dialogue with them and defined that it’s not wholesome to spend the entire day taking part in video games.

He says the trick was to introduce different types of leisure, corresponding to film classes at dwelling, soccer and even the gymnasium.

“They obtained actually scorching and I could not even get shut. With the change, we have now strengthened our household bond.”

Tips on the best way to work


It must be understood that society is consistently altering and due to this fact, teenagers are not the identical. Conversations needs to be led by dad and mom, respecting children’s individuality and retaining an ear open to questions offered. Acting authoritatively can harm and alienate a youngster.

Trying to get nearer to your children generally is a good option to strengthen your emotional bond. A great way is to have interaction with the pursuits of the teenagers. For instance, attempt speaking in regards to the video games he likes essentially the most and those he dislikes

When the bond is compromised, psychological assist needs to be sought. Parents are mediators and by dialogue they’ll strengthen household connections.

well being

During the pandemic, many teenagers with psychological well being issues have been extra remoted and locked of their properties. Therefore, dad and mom ought to pay attention to their children’s temper or conduct adjustments. In that case, search psychological assist.

Source: Experts interviewed.


“The dialog should be led by dad and mom, however variations should be revered. Society has modified, as have teenagers.” Sirlene Ferreira, Clinical Psychologist Sirlene Ferreira, Clinical Psychologist

| Photo: Prakash

“Advice is just not welcome. Parents want to know that pushy and comparative speech doesn’t work.” Vanessa Cavalcante, Family Therapist

| Photo: Prakash

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